A Rozy View on Life

I am John Rozelle, hear me ROAR like a dinosaur!

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

I may not be a genius, but I am smarter than a lot of people.

I flew to Seattle a couple weeks ago. There's one thing about airlines that continues to boggle my mind. You know how there are different boarding zones to determine what order people get on the plane? This is a good idea.

First class is usually first to board. I understand this. They spent more money on their tickets and they deserve to board first so that everyone else is forced to walk by them lounging in their comfy over-sized leather seats with a cocktail in hand, everyone else jealous of their lush setting while heading back to coach. I understand this.
I also understand having handicapped people and parents with small children boarding early. They need more time.

It's the whole organizational structure of the boarding zones that I don't understand. If I were in charge, I have at least a couple ideas of how I would organize the boarding zones. Perhaps the first people to board would be those in the back of the plane. This way you never have to force your way by someone in the aisle or awkwardly squeeze into the row to let someone pass. No more waiting for that guy to try and cram his over-sized carry-on in the overhead bin. You fill up the plane from back to front. This makes sense.

Another option would be to have everyone with window seats board first. This philosophy seats passengers from the outside in, thereby removing the inconvenience of having to asking your row neighbor to get up so that you can get past them to your seat. No more of that holding your ticket in your hand and pointing to your window seat so that person knows to get up, move into the center aisle (congesting traffic) and allow you to access your seat. This strategy also seems to make sense.
What doesn't make sense is the reality of how the boarding zones actually work. The boarding zones seem nicely organized into a hierarchical structure of numbers, with passengers boarding the plane in either ascending or descending order of zone number. A problem is encountered when one gets on the plane and realizes that the boarding zones are completely irrelevant to the passengers' seat numbers. There are people everywhere on the plane, front and back, window and aisle seats, clearly no organization to how people are shuttled onto the plane. There is truly no reason for boarding zones except to give passengers the false perception of organization.
Perhaps my criticism of the boarding zones being completely irrelevant is unfair. I do allow room for the possibility that the boarding zone correspond to passenger's birthday, favorite color, favorite cereal, phone number, or any variety of personal information. I have not done enough research to verify any of these. The point being that regardless of these possibilities, the boarding zones do in no way increase the effectiveness of boarding the plane, except perhaps by the fact that there will be four short lines for boarding the plane instead of one long line. Within this optimism, there still remains the reality that it will take just as long, just as many people will have to squeeze into the row to let another pass, you still have to wait for the guy to cram his luggage in the overhead bin and you still have to point to your seat and make your row neighbor get in someone else's way by moving into the center aisle to let you by.
Thank goodness I only had to pay $400 for this kind of efficiency. I hope the plane mechanics have a little more foresight.


  • At 6:39 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I think about this everytime I fly! If only they were as smart as we are.


  • At 9:33 AM, Blogger Alexis said…

    Wow, this is a pretty serious post. I share your frustration and am very sorry you had to endure it on my account.

    Seriously, though: silverware drawer and refrigerator = pure brilliance.

    My mom basically wants to adopt you and Pete. For real.

  • At 10:30 PM, Anonymous Linda said…

    she's right -her mom does want to adopt you-for real.
    Kerri and I went to Spokane last w/e to return her to school. Your name came up as we went through town, however, it was rodeo weekend- thus the thought of wandering in hopes of finding you seemed kind of ridiculous- plus it is just too windy in Ellensburg! anyway- thank you for staying with us -it was really helful in so many ways.
    The pix were just such WONDERFUL additions to our post wedding doldrums!Linda


Post a Comment

<< Home